New definitions for 2003

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing
why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who
was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in, makes a lot
of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to
absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the
boss rather than working hard.

SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day
swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.

PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something
loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the
walls to see what's going on.

MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer
to the couch potato.

SITCOM: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of
them stops working to stay home with the kids.

STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being
stressed out and whiny.

SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered
useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive
use.

XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies
from one's workplace.

IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that
are annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching
them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the
crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning
just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the
adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant
to the problems they were designed to solve.

404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error
message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document
could not be located.

GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly
the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip
malls, subdivisions.

OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you
realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.

WOOFY(S): Well Off Older Folks.

CROP DUSTING: Surreptitiously farting while passing thru
a cube farm, then enjoying the sounds of dismay and disgust!
(leads to 'PRAIRIE DOGGING'.)